4 Reasons Why You're Depressed at Work And What To About it.

''One of the most courageous things you can do is identify yourself , know who you are, what you believe in and where you want to go''. - Sheila Murray

If you find yourself waking up unmotivated on a Monday morning, frustrated with the way the week went.

Or you're generally unhappy within your workplace or outside, then it's time to make a change, leave the job totally or change some things perhaps?

For some people an exit sounds very lovely, but sadly, it's unrealistic for them.

If you leaving your job isn't right for you, then we need to figure out how we can make the environment less stressful for you.

Being depressed at work is a global problem, this makes us less productive, less effective, and generally not motivated.

Let's address some reasons that might help you understand why you're unhappy at work.

1. Salary. At the end of each month you just look at your account balance and you feel unfulfilled and sad. you feel like you're harder than you're than what you're getting paid for.

But i have to warn you, if you want to equal your level of happiness with your basic salary, then you need to step your game, your level of intent must match your efforts.

You have to look for more ways to contribute, you have to perform, come up with solutions to problems that's happening in your circle and your will get satisfaction that goes beyond just your salary.

2. Your Co-workers. You don't like the people you work with or you probably not working with those people you really want to work with within the organisation.

The best thing you can do is handle these people you don't like with some objectivity and emotional stability. Constant complain about your co-workers might make you seem a bit too much of a complainer.

You still need to ask yourself if the people are really the problem or you're just overreacting.Always start with self examination before jumping into conclusions.

3.You Feel Trapped. This when you feel extremely unchallenged and bored and yet there's nothing you can do... Well, maybe there's something you can do.

When you spend too much of your time during boring stuffs, it might affect some other part of your life, so you need to look for inspiration outside of work.

What i'm really saying is that you just look for somethings to motivate you about your work, maybe thinking of why you chose the work in the first place.

There are so many career related audios or video tapes that you can watch, you can even motivate your colleague out of the blue while still feeling good about yourself.

If doesn't turn you on, you might want to go for a walk instead, or just find something that can really get you back in the game.

4.Expectations.  Do you have an overly demanding boss that expects you to do too much in just too little time?

You need to learn how to manage demanding bosses, not doing do is critical, this might always bring that feeling of your work not being just satisfactory enough.

Even your self esteem will deteriorate over time if it continues that way.

Allow this to continue is vital, i'm not saying you should yell at your boss or argue, No.

You just need to courageously communicate the details of the work assigned to you, making your boss for aware how long it will take to complete a given task.

You should not assume your boss knows and understands the time it takes to complete an assignment.

You must make them aware of the human limits and priorities. Lastly, you must find a common ground to establish your terms and ways to create a symbiotic expectations.

Darling, Just own it. have blessed week

6 Uplifting Quotes Every Woman Should Live By

 Below are positive Quotes from leading women, Hope you enjoy!


''Don't compromise yourself, You're all you've got, There's no yesterday, no tomorrow, it's all  the same day.'' - Janis Joplin


''Whatever you do, be different - that was the advice my mother gave me, and i can't think of a better advice for an entrepreneur. If you're different, you'll stand out.'' - Anita Roddick 


''A woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman, But the search to find that voice can be extremely difficult.'' - Melinda Gates 


''I've come to believe that each of us has a personal calling that's as unique as a fingerprint - and that  the best way to succeed is to discover what you love and then offer it to others in form of a service, working hard and also allow the energy of the universe to lead you.'' -  Oprah Winfrey 


"You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.'' - Maya Angelou 


"I really worked hard at trying to see the big picture and not getting stuck in  ego. I believe we're all put on this planet for a purpose, and we all have a different purpose... When you connect with that love and that compassion, that's when everything unfolds.'' - Ellen DeGeneres 

How to Not Be a Newbie Fashion Designer When You're a Newbie Fashion Designer

''Fashion is life, and just like life,you must always express your feelings freely'' - Adama ndiaye

Every fashion designer started with this one question; How can i be a success in this field?

Some chose to attend the university and get a fashion degree, others turned to fashion schools, while some other part of the group chose to start the business from the start and in hope that they'll turn to fashion schools or attend some courses later to refine their skills.

This is a very broad field but we'll just look at some basics you can work on today.

When you ask young women, what do you want to become in this field, i tend to hear the normal from almost every young women, which is ''i just want to be a fashion designer''. i think you need to be specific and start taking your dreams very seriously.

You know most designers work with design models, pick , search,or think about a design model that you really admire, now ask yourself '' can i implement the model i just visualized''?

If you can, very good, if you can't, no cause for alarm. i trust you are going to get better very soon. greatness is a lot of small things done well.

Lets quickly list out some basic steps to help you get better in no time.

(1)Knowing how to make the basic pattern of the any design you are working on (very important)

(2)Choice of fabric, i already did a post on this one; you need a very good knowledge about the textile and fabric that are in the market, their characteristics and effects on appearance.

(3)How to implement the fabric on the mannequin; A mannequin is that doll used to display clothing

(4)Knowing how to adjust and pad the mannequin to fit your desired sizes.

(5)Basic use of hand stitches to complete to complete your design.

(6) Effective use of the sewing machine.

You see many young woman whom after acquiring basics in drawing and coloring on papers, they feel that's all there is. That is why we have many young frustrated beginners these days. Fashion designing is indeed a very broad field.

So you must know how to implement your design, many so called designers today have designs that cannot even be implemented by them, not because these designs can't be implemented, this is mostly due to inappropriate knowledge and principles of design.

There's not limit to how versatile you can be, you can create various model under one classification. Once you know and master your craft, you can express your ideas in more than one way.

As they say, there are 1000 ways to skin a cat!

This is a very great  field you've chosen, So, Believe in yourself and make things happen. stay blessed

Becoming A Virtuous Woman

 The Wife of Noble Character

¹⁰ A wife of noble character who can find?
    She is worth far more than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
    and lacks nothing of value.
¹² She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life.
¹³ She selects wool and flax
    and works with eager hands.
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
    bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night;
    she provides food for her family
    and portions for her female servants.
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
    out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
    and her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
    and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
    and extends her hands to the needy.
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
    for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
²² She makes coverings for her bed;
    she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
    where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
    and supplies the merchants with sashes.
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
    she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.”
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Become the woman God wants you to become today!

4 Tips on Creating a Balance between Work and Being a Mother

Work-life balance is a plan that helps people in prioritizing their time and energy between work and other some other vital aspects of their life. for some career oriented moms, creating a balance between work and family might seem a bit too much a hassle.

Despite these perceptions, some moms are really creating a valuable and meaningful family life outside their outside their work. These are some the tips they practice.

(1) They Aside Time For Family,Friends,& Important Issues; The mothers that have been able to carve out some time for a work-life balance that gets them rolling didn't just achieve it out of the blue by waiting for the little time they get after work.

They make some very strict rules about planning and setting time off to spend outside work with their family and they really stand by this principle.

 Even though they maybe so many situations fighting for their attention at the office/place of work, they always take it into very deep consideration before trying to break this rule.

(2) They Turn Off Distractions; As a working mother, you need to raise your standards and take control. the moms who maintain this balance always try to turn off their electronic devices, to be able to enjoy a quality family time and also not to become interrupted when doing some things that really matter to them.

Find some very simple moments to simply enjoy and experience life. Become involved in some activities that allows you to get away from the every day pressure.

Get involved in routines that enables you to relax, and rejuvenate your whole body and soul.

(3)Make Deliberate Choices About your Life; Life just don't happen, it is a mirror of our everyday choices.

Make deliberate choices about how you want to spend your time and what life really means to you.

Talk to your husband, get on the same page with him. come up with a plan about things are important to your family.

Once you make a decision, develop a road map that is going to get you there and be consistent.

(4) Know What's Working And What Isn't ; You need to be able to see for yourself some strategies that are working and those that aren't.

If your work-life balance gets out of hand, that is a result of some you neglecting some things that are not to neglected.

Mothers that are very good at staying on track makes a very deliberate choice to talk to their spouses and children about what is working or not, and how they might adjust.

Situations might change and life might happen, however, you need to avoid going down a round that doesn't lead to your desired destination just because you were not paying attention.

Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life. Stay Blessed and enjoy the weekend!

A message to our hijabite sisters

''And tell the believing women to reduce (some) of their vision and guard their private parts and not expose their adornment except that which (necessarily) appears thereof and to wrap their head-covers over their chests and not expose their adornment except to their husbands' fathers,their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers, their brothers' sons, their sisters sons, their women, that which their right hand posses, or those male attendants having no physical desire, or children who are not yet aware of the private aspects of women. And let them not stamp their feet to make known what they conceal of their adornment. And turn to Allah in repentance, all of you, O believers, that you might succeed.'' Q, 24;31

True is the word of Almighty Allah, the uncreated creator, the most benevolent and the most merciful. God who commanded the best of mankind and custodian of good tidings, Prophet Muhammad(SAW).

The above quoted commandment which was revealed in an unedited, unadulterated, and unblemished Glorious Quran and had been in existence for more than 14 centuries.

Muslims of this generation have nothing to add or remove but to abide by the instruction of the Supernatural God in whose hand lays the most sophisticated remote controls with which affairs of men are manned.

He has the key the key to life and death, he can give and take without permission or approval from anybody, anytime and anywhere.

Hijab is an obedient way of worshipping Allah without questioning the morale behind the commandment, or subjecting the commandment to the opinion and view of the people. Since our creator is the Most Wise, He knows that his commandment is for the good of individuals and the society at large.

While on-lookers see Hijab as a symbol of muslim woman identity, Muslim women see hijab as a religious obligation which is a test of her faith in Allah.

Hijab represents a woman's submission to her creator and her connection with the faith. when a muslim woman wears hijab, she is obeying and submitting to Allah.

When a woman wears hijab; she liberates herself from the vain and selfish desire to show off her beauty in competition with other women around her. The innate desire of wanton display of opulence is tamed by modesty of hijab covering.

The tendency of being enslaved by the corporate capitalistic industry known for publishing naked women to sell anything is removed.  when we wear hijab, we deprive privy eyes from scrutinizing our physical appearance and foreclose the possibility of passing a comment about our beauty.

It is however painful that in the society, which shows  tolerance towards those who flex around in nudity; finds it difficult to tolerate obedient servants of Allah who on their won volition adhere strictly to the injunction of the Supreme Being who has the final say on the day of reckoning.

We are living in an era where woman dignity is relegated to the background. they count it as a norm, any form of indecent dressing of woman and ungodly acts.

Contrary to the reason why we wear hijab, they ascribe inferiority, backwardness, and enslavement to the usage of the veil.  while advocate of nudity are attacking our mode of dressing, the enemies of the state are disguising in our attire to execute their dastard acts.

Suicide bombers and insurgents are carrying out their deadly mission with Hijab. this act further proves the enemies of Allah are stopping at nothing to discourage us from obeying His commandment and lead us astray having discovered the right path to everlasting salvation.

They want to instigate the society against wearing of Hijab, and by extension compel of the government to ban us from adorning the veil. Historical documentation has it that the evil planners had been in existence for long. from generations to generations, they constitute themselves as hindrances to the full devotion of the believers.

They did more than that during the time of Prophet Muhammad (SAW), they conspired
 against his disciples with the aim of deriding the message they were to pass to generations. Evidence  abounds that the consistence and persistence of the people of faith in the past stand them out today as our mentors,teachers, heroes and pride.

Our joy lies in the fact that the choice of Hijab is not our decision but Allah's commandment. As evil doers are planning to dissuade the society from wearing hijab; Allah is planning to make hijab a symbol of Glory. The battle is not our own, we leave the aspersions, vituperations, defamation, and conspiracy of the enemy of Hijab to the Almighty Allah who command us to wear the veil. He will reward each and every one of us accordingly.

Every first of February is dedicated for the commemoration of the world Hijab day, women of all religious affiliations are encouraged to dress like us and tell us how they feel with the Hijab. The exercise commenced in the year 2013 by Nazman Khan, a New york resident who purposely designed to counteract that Hijab is a symbol of oppression and segregation.

Nigeria was commemorated in 2014, since then activities to mark the day has been lined up across the states of the federation.

this was originally written by Hajia Aminat Omoti, The Amira Of Federation Of muslim women Associations In Nigeria. and yess! i'm a proud muslim too.

3 Simple Ways To Stay In Shape

Do you know your fitness is 100% mental? Your body won't go if your mind doesn't push it. I know sometimes it pains you to continue but it's going to be much worse if you stop.

Your body achieves what your mind believes, most women think a man can make them feel sexy,strong, blah blah. sorry, that's a cliche. Exercise makes you strong and sexy. Keeping fit is not and should not be about being better than anybody,

It's about being better than you used to be,physically,mentally and spiritually. most people let themselves off the hook with the i don't have enough time syndrome. well, i'm here to tell you that it's not about having time but making time. Yesterday, you said tomorrow.

You need to look good and keep fit for you, we all know it increases our self esteem.

Keep calm and work it out, One pound a time.

1.- Find a way to enjoy exercise- This is simple, move at your own pace. when you get comfortable with a routine, you will eventually find a way to enjoy it and even anticipate it. i challenge you to find a different approach, one that works for you and you alone.

Once you believe you can do this, you're half way there.

2.- Don't Diet-  The only thing you should consider paying attention to is your body. what keeps you energized throughout the day?

 listen to your body when it comes eating, when you're having a well balanced meal, your body will tell you when it needs refueling.

You really don't need to starve yourself, just make clean and healthy eating a priority. take is slow. slow progress is better than no progress.

Stop saying i wish and start saying i will.

3.- You don't need to make the Gym your 2nd Home- well, we the Tv and we see athletes getting on some extreme routines and all those stuffs, which is good though for athletes. Are you trying to be an athlete, wrestler, a professional body builder or you are just trying to stay in shape?

You really don't need to become an health extremist who does extreme routines and probably spend all day at the gym. Even running for at least 10 minutes a day at an enduring pace  has been proven to reduce the risk of cardiovascular diseases. Focus on health.

What seems impossible today will one day be your warm up, everything you need is already inside of you. you did not come to this world to be average.

Every pro was once an amateur, so decide to start now. When you begin to see results, it becomes an addiction.

Don't make excuses, make results and stay awesome.

Entrepreneurship;What Every Nigerian Woman Must Know.

 "TELL THE NEGATIVE COMMITTEE THAT MEETS INSIDE YOUR HEAD TO SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP'' - Ann Bradford

 No matter how old you are or what background you are from,you were born into this country for a reason. don't think about yourself as just being a 'woman',you're better than that. As the seventh secretary of the united nations, Kofi Annan Once said, '' There is no tool for development for effective than the empowerment of women''.

Entrepreneurship has undergo a very significant change all around the world and we can see more and more women stepping up the game. I will not be part of those ''motivational speakers'' that will just tell you to follow your dreams, motivation is really not enough, what are they motivating you about? what? We need to start appreciating the strengths of our women and girls, you guys rock.

If you check most my post, you'll see i tend to relate with the current trends around our women; that is make up, fashion designing; offering insights based on what you are already accustomed with.

You might have been hearing some people say, Change your mindset,change this, change that, like it's really that easy. i want you to focus on your strengths and strengths alone!

Don't set limits to what you can achieve, take up something you have passion for. all those ground breaking 'ideas' people talk about will not result into a successful business if there's no passion. Focus on the area of whatever it is you love doing and build a business around it. you call the shots!

Trust your instincts, it takes gut to do this. i'm not saying you shouldn't seek advice or getting a mentor or something, but at the end of it all, always trust you instincts.Be original and stay focused, only you can make this happen for you. You are building your future right now and every decision you make is setting boundaries and rules for what's to follow in your business life.

Do you know your target customers? for the fashionists, let's say your specialty is the haute couture, then you need to focus on the modern day trends among sizzling fashion females of this time. i already did one post on building customer experience, you should read.

Don't listen to the people that wants you to focus on trying to improve something you are not good at, You were born with a follow come set of skills and passion, don't let anybody take that away from you.
Whatever your dreams are, start taking them very seriously, you never know what the future might hold. Greatness is a lot of small thing done well. start where you are, with what you have, cos what you have is plenty!

I did a post for the make up artists too. i'll keep on researching the market for you and offer you business insights. you're golden. God bless you for reading.

What you should do when you think of getting a divorce.

Marriage is about becoming a team,you are going to spend the rest of your life learning about each other, and every now and then,things blow up. But the beauty of marriage is that if you picked the right person and you both love one another, you will always figure out a way to get through it.

Maybe you've just found yourself sitting on the edge and you feel like you have just 2 options; Quit or stay. i want you to know that divorce is a personal decision and most times, spouses only think of themselves when they consider divorce. You should always, no matter the circumstances, give it one last try and who knows, you might just get that improved marital life. You should know these 3 things though.

1.- What is really the problem?  most women say ' i am not just happy anymore'. i'm not trying to belittle your feelings but that doesn't make sense. why are you not happy anymore? why you focus on the why, you gain clarity and you can be able to focus on what the problem really is.

When you've gotten clear on your why, which is a very good start. then you proceed to let him know what needs to change,to aid your satisfaction in the marriage. what do you really want? more attention? Freedom?(positively), or you just need a deep level of emotional and mental connection? communicate your needs clearly.

2.- Talk about things you need- you know one of those heart to heart talks? i suggest you do this when this get a bit hot and heated, when the both of you are feeling a little less angry in the midst of all you got going on. Be very specific about your needs, communicate them with clarity, the catch here is the 'i' word.

Don't just say you never listen to me or you never care about my emotional needs, instead, try; i would really love us to try and listen to each other affectionately and spend some quality time together. try to keep calm during the whole conversation and always listen more than you talk.

Don't be arrogant and please do not give threats. this will only be compounding the problem.

3.- Beware Of friends/family- our family members and friends can really be doing us more harm than good when it comes to delicate issues like this. they might even think they are protecting us when they tell us to leave our marriages just because this gets a bit awry and they feel they don't want us to get hurt, Be careful, they might be sentimental.

You know mothers, they will quickly tell you to move back in with them rather than focus on solving the issue. is that what you truly and really want? if you have some friends or some routines that are not making it easy for you to focus on your marriage, you need to cut them off right now. Make your marital life a priority.

When you cut out distractions, you are going to have all the energy you need to focus on making your marriage work. God bless your family. Please do share with a wife, and leave a comment.

3 Strategies to navigating a successful career

 ''To be successful, the first thing to do is to fall in love with your work'' -  Sister mary lauretta

These days we see how rapidly women are advancing in their career all over the world. prior to a blog post i read on muyiwa afolabi's blog sometime this year. women are now being represented in the workforce in a very large number these days. what really separates dreamers from doers is just goals. lasting success can be created through good habits. Women from all around the world are breaking career barriers, don't be left out.

1.- Productivity- it is not enough to just be 'busy' without having anything to show for it. are you really working at your full capacity? does your output reflects your best efforts? when you get to the office, do the most important things first, don't procrastinate, you want to gist and have fun with your girlfriends? that's why you have a lunch time or something. you really need to start taking your work serious and become more productive,

This helps you get more done in lesser time than you can actually imagine. focus on the work at hand. too much multitasking stresses the brain out, start today to become more result oriented, focus solely on the task at hand. be immersed in the present moment and get your job done faster and effectively.

2.- Confidence- Are you a positive person? optimism is very important in your career, it works hand in hand with confidence. Where do you see yourself 3 years from this time? What kind of people do you surround yourself with? you see, positive people make you feel about yourself because they automatically feel good about themselves, these set of people are the kind of people you want to relate it at your place of work.

When you surround yourself with positive people, you become enthusiastic about your life,family,career. Self confidence enhances the quality of our work, which determines our level of output. Become a positive person today, think positive thoughts only.

Since there's no one on earth just like you, you have no reason to feel inferior. gain confidence today.

3.- Reputation-  This is golden, reputations are build over a long period of time, but can be damaged in nano seconds. Guard it with your life. you should view yourself from the eyes of your colleagues, it takes a lot to be a reputable person, positively. be a woman of your words, don't say what you cannot do, always help others sincerely, always do a little more than is required, be consistent, and most of all, be a magnificent woman.

How Fashion Designers Can Improve Customer Experience

                         
                                         "Life Isn't Perfect,But Your Outfit Can be''

As a fashionist, customers experience tactics begins with knowing what your customer really needs or wants, which is going to be proportional to their expectations of you. The effort you put into building customer relationship will mirror the amount of long term clients you get and how far you are going to go in the industry.

Knowing this, you can begin to work on how you can create a interpersonal business atmosphere, that might even surpass your customers expectations of you.

We as human beings all need human engagement, we love to feel important, the old saying that people can forget a lot of things about you but definitely not how you made them feel. you should begin to treat your every customer very well and try to turn every transaction they have with you into a personalized experience.

You should be building a relationship beyond fashion, a relationship that can translate to many other things in the future, How do you want to be remembered? the lousy designer who doesn't know when to talk or when you just listen? or. okay this should be you, or the down to earth, pretty, jovial designer? who is just as passionate about being the best she can be for her customers while loving her work still.

You should make a choice this morning and get to work. i know you have that mind sight, and i know you have vision for authorities. so don't ever settle for less than you can actually become.  God bless you. You can share your thoughts with me, a question perhaps?

3 Things You shouldn't do during pregnancy.

''No one else will ever know the strength of my love for you, After all, you are the only one who knows what my heart sounds like from inside'' Anonymous Mother

Being a mother is a blessing, a rare gift,an everlasting relationship that doesn't die, becoming a mother is much more than just giving birth to a baby. There's a human being inside you that depends solely on your actions and activities for survival.

Motherhood and giving birth is really a miracle, it's sometimes surprising how God does these things, it a blessing. it really is. As a mother-to-be, there are some things that are detrimental to your own health and that of your unborn child.  What are these simple yet dangerous things you do/take?

1.- Unbalanced Diet- well, you might think you got this covered but think again, does your food contain at least a minimum amount of all categories of food everyday? Not consuming a balanced diet can lead to  a low optimum fetal development, that is below the normal fetus development.
this can be risky to your own health too.

2.- Caffeine-  excess consumption of caffeine during pregnancy has been said to be dangerous. caffeine is an addictive stimulant that flows easily from the placenta  to the developing fetus. it can be found in energy drinks, tea bags, coffee, chocolate bars,

 Pregnant women have been advised to take no more than 300mg or less of caffeine, that is approximately six cups of tea, eight cans of cola, three cups of coffee. can you try and lower your caffeine intake? please do, thank you.

3.- Stress-  Pregnancy itself should be enough stress, those swollen legs and finding it hard to sleep in a comfortable way should be enough stress. stress can't lead to so many unexpected things. so please, less stress.

''Motherhood is not a hobby, it's not something you do if you can squeeze time in,it is what God gave you time for'' - Rachel jankovic

Do you know any pregnant friend? family member? Please share with them.

3 ways to manage your differences with your Husband.

''If you are wrong and you shut up, you are wise.If you are right and you shut up,you are married"

Many wives try to force changes in their husbands, not only is this exhausting, the change might literally not come up at the end. it is also an insult to our own individual uniqueness. God has made us distinct with each of us having different personalities, wants and needs.

Take a moment and think about this; Do you know our individual DNA,the double strands,our fingerprints is restricted to us and us alone. so think again if you really think you can change your husband.

Differences, however tends to add sauce to life, conflicts are bound to happen no matter who you are with. this is what makes the relationships worth the stress. lets talk about these 3 ways that might help you manage your individual differences.

1.- Conflict is inevitable; when you acknowledge this fact, you've taken an added advancement, emotionally and psychologically, This difference in personality might be something very complex,maybe something you are trying hard to cope with, or maybe something very simple; you might want him to always drop you at your own office, and he might probably just keeping dropping you 2 bus stops before your office.

The size of the conflict doesn't really matter. what really counts is how manage these issues. singly or together. but i know you are smart wife, so just tend to slow down the tempo okay?

2.- Give clear-cut complaints only!.- people are not their behaviors,we are not our habits either, we accumulate these traits overtime, consciously or sub consciously. they can be unlearned. when you hit the nail on the head, rather than beating around the bush, the problem becomes easier to address. however he might have peeved you, just go straight to the point. no stress.

3.-Compassion.- you might always notice some personal differences in your husband and you might always feel like yelling, but you know what? you are just too great a wife for that, if you choose to see these differences as a gift, then you automatically open your pathway to greater acceptance. Concentrate on your husband's strength and give complements often..

Don't forget, we all struggle. God bless your union.

Fashion Designing ; Customer Psychology

''In order to be irreplaceable,One must be different - Coco Chanell

 Hey fam! do you know our choice of what to wear, to some extent determines how we view and judge each other? why do you think the high end fashionists we have down here always try to dress elegant and flawless? lets not talk gender now, you might want to make clothes for guys too.

whether male or female, our choice of fashion mirrors our self image. it's plain psychology. what does this mean to a creative fashionist like you? you see, our primary reasons to wear clothings has evolved, it's more than just using it as an aid for warmth,shelter and what not. They now affect the way we see ourselves , no wonder people will dress to kill even when they don't have money for cab.

This is an added advantage to you, you are already inside the heads of your customers, but you need to get very creative, strong work ethic and come up with something very very distinct. i'm very positive you'll deliver. You are a star, don't let nobody tell you otherwise baby.

Go get them!!

4 things every young fashion designer must know

 ''Don't let dreams just be dreams,with God, hard work and determination,it can be a reality'' - danielle & chantelle

As a young fashion designer, you need to know fashion is deep, there is more to fashion than just putting on your desired on clothing, fashion is business, fashion is liftsyle. lets take a these short 4 points.

1.- Perfecting your craft.- To be a successful fashion designer you need to be very good at what you do. very few young girls take fashion beyond just wearing of clothes and taking pictures. you need to be very versatile;  which includes an A level sketching ability, you need to think creatively and come up with your own concepts and designs.

Are you learning how to sew already? this is important, how important? you know how important  chilli pepper is to indomie right? that is how a good practical sewing ability is to your fashion career.

you also need to have a very good mind sight, being able to forecast trends on instagram and the likes.

2.- What parts of fashion excites you? - what are you really interested in? you need to pick a specialty. i'm sure you see all those creative styles on Bellanaija and Asoebibella. Don't try to go for generality, this can be exhausting. decide fast on how its going to be, save yourself some trouble and work effectively.

3.- Be realistic- we all love the fame that come with whatever we do right? if it's something positive though. fashion is diverse, and only special people like you can handle it. Even when you see those really creative designs on AsoEbibella(Bella is really great for inspiration) but those set of people are just one of the few you might not get to at first, why not try and dominate your locality with your own uniqueness? be a big fish in a small pond.

Do your thing and let your creativity speak for itself and in no time you might get chocked with fame. it's just about knowing what you really want and working hard to get it.

4.- Inspiration- Instagram can be a very good tool for inspiration. most favorably Bellanaija's account. you really can make something happen, even in this recession. check out the styles, designs and fabrics. you know we nigerians have love for something glamorous and clothes that look good on us.

Observe every inch and piece you see out there about your work. if not now, when?

You should share this with your friends, ask questions and let me know how i can help. God bless.

3 Communication skills every wife must have

''Marriage is not 50/50, divorce is 50/50 . Marriage has to be 100/100. it isn't dividing everything in half, but giving everything you've got - Dave willis

We all know how vital effective communication is to you and your husband, bad communication can lead to so many things we should not try to imagine. how can you prevent that? lets discuss some points, shall we?

1.- 105% Attention- Do unto others what you want to be done unto you, when having a conversation with your husband, eliminate all sorts of distractions, divided listening can really be an obstacle in marital communication, for example, lets say you are trying to have a very important discussion with or someone important and they cant seem to get off their phone or stop staring at their computers or Tvs.

  This can be very frustrating right? when your hubby asks or wants to have a discussion with you and he sees you are giving an undivided attention, do you know you are being seductive?(depends on how you use your eyes sha)  our eyes are our most powerful tool, use it well! cutting off all distractions show you are really willing to listen and give him your undivided attention. and you know what? its priceless.

2.- Seeing Things From Their Perspective- When you do this effectively, only this one thing can give an edge. Does he come home late? don't just complain like he expects you to. when you try and ask what really happened, seeing this from his own window. he might just try to see things from your own angle too, that you're just concerned about his security, she's just being a caring and loving wife, he'll say. Are you caring and loving?

3.- Timing- There are some certain times you should never talk about certain topics, don't even bring them up. i know you know what i'm talking about. you're an awesome wife. put it under control.

Husbands can be very annoying at times, but hey, you love him right? fight,Argue but stay married.

Share your thoughts and lets talk. God bless your family.

3 Ways to be irreplaceable at your place of work.

''I didn't always know what i wanted to do, but i knew the kind of woman i want to become'' - Diane furstenberg .

With the kind of momentum our beloved country is moving at, Job security has and will be a very tough concern for everybody in the corporate world, with the rate at which people are being laid off, slashing of salaries, all these factors might  might be a concern for your own job security.

Do you know that even in your own company have some staffs that are too important to be laid off? i'm sure you do and i'm not only talking about those men and women at the top level alone, we both know some recruits can be in this position too.

How can you be the Go-to person in your office? your  bosses at the top counting on you for almost everything, that would be great right? Lets see what you might have been doing wrong

1.- Extra work-  this just very simple, be willing to do a little more than is required of you. but Nigerians in the corporate world can be funny sometimes. what most employees don't know is that the top level executives, i mean those top level executives  are always watching. if you don't know. know that now.

They notice everything that is gong on, they know all the strengths and weaknesses of their workers. become the Go-to person, do somethings that are not required of you, but its your work. so do it diligently, let your fellow employees call you names, don't mind them, you already know where you are going. Be there before the boss arrives and also be there when he leaves.

2.- Come with solutions,not problems- There's something you and your co workers are always complaining about. it might not be something you can fix yourself, but offering insights on how it can be fixed or referring the company to someone that can fix, is something only special employees like you can do. think solutions all day and see the real change.

3.- Attitude- Hmm, attitude. this might sound like a cliche but do you know that most people don't value their jobs at all? they see it as a means of survival or just some routine check, does that make sense? work is to be enjoyed and how can you enjoy work when your attitude is just not recommendable? Your attitude is contagious, people will organically be drawn to that full of life person, that smiles a lot and have good communication skills (that's you right?)

Is life not even too short not to be happy about? Stay blessed and make sure you drop your comments and Share.

3 Parenting Skills You Might Not Have As A Mother

''Each Day of our lives, we make deposits in the memory bank of our children''- Charles swindell

I think you are a great mom,yes you ma, you, by reading this you are already doing what 99% of mothers will not do. There's something unique about nigerian mothers,i don't know if its in our DNA to always want to go to any length for our child. is it just me that feel that way or do we sync?

The raising of children and all the responsibilities and activities that come with it can be overwhelming sometimes, we tend to lag in some few disciplines that we should not, but that's the point, we are human and not robots, mistakes are inevitable. Lets discuss just 3 points this morning.

1.- Mother/child Relationship skills- being a mother is not easy, lets face the truth, but whatever is worth doing is worth doing well right? How often do you spend Quality time with your children?  Do you know that 1 hour of quality time is much more valuable than 10 hours of passive time?

I know most times you are probably too tired because of work and some other things, but remember that your babies are your queens and kings, they are all you got, so make out time to share their own activities with them, do something they love doing with them,bond with them, they are your future!

2.- Sincere Appreciation- The most extraordinary feelings in the world can't be seen with our eyes, we feel them in our hearts. that little appreciative and encouraging word you say to them when they do something good no matter how small will go a long way. it will, give it a try. everybody wants to be understood , so please do keep an open communication.

3.- Manage Your Mood-  Every mother wants what they believe is best for their children. Do you know moods are very contagious? you might not always be in the mood to communicate sometimes which is very understandable, but how do you relate it to your kids? do you just scream at them? this might lead to miscommunication on their own part, when they don't know whats really wrong with mummy.

Try the soft and tender approach, communicate how you feel in a low soft tone and you know kids, they might light up your world that very minute!

That's it supermom, don't forget to drop your comments and share. God bless you!

How to set up a cake business

 
  ''A woman who walks in purpose does not have to chase people or opportunities, her light causes people and opportunities to chase her''

I know you, young virtuous woman, your strengths. how you thrive in economies such as ours down here, you are a diamond and its going to take more than a recessive country to put out your light.

You must have baked a lot of cakes, cupcakes for friends, and now i think you should take your expertise to the next level, but how exactly? we are family. and family take care of themselves and i don't take care of you, who will?

Whatever part of the country you are reading this from,they are probably many people baking cakes and how do you stand out? make something extraordinary, i trust you can deliver, when you trust yourself to be the best baker you can be, you are already halfway there.

Firstly, what exactly do you want to offer? do you want to bake for weddings? birthdays? what will set your brand apart? visualize and get a paper. write it all out, it's all up to you to become the best baker nigeria has seen.

Secondly, money matters, they said we should cut our coat according to our sizes. create a business that mirrors your budget, be realistic. this is the beginning of something remarkable for you,take it slow. how much do you think you can make per month?

Start from your house or your hostel, just make sure your location doesn't add up extra costs. you will need cupcake boxes, cake boards and the rest, how much will it cost you? do you know someone that has these equipments? Borrow if need  be.

Thirdly, work,work,work

Get out there and get what you want! As melinda gates said; a woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman.

What New Make Up Artists should Know

         ''People will stare..make it worth their while'' - Harry Winston

 Okay this is short, i just thought i'd share this. first things first, i think the first thing you should know is your color matching skills, i think you should always go with make up tools that will always make you stand out, we have a lot of inferior products being used today and you are not just any kind of make up artist, you are selling happiness and bringing fulfillment to the faces of your customers.

So i think something professional will do,you know, using kits based on color pigments, not just a lousy brand name with a below average result.

Make sure you don't give your clients reasons to complain, complaints might come up if your equipments are dirty in some way, you are not an ordinary make up artist, you did not stay inside your mother for 9 months to be ordinary. try to keep your tools as neat as possible. Don't take pictures without asking for permission. you should take a selfie with your clients instead! keep it professional from the beginning to the end baby.

For your own safety and that of your clients, i can't stress cleaniness enough, wash your hands before and after the job, keep brushes clean and dust free, eye pencils should be sharpened effectively. when applying mascara, don't deep the wand into the mascara more than once.

Please don't forget to drop your comments and share this piece. God bless you

Choosing Fabric? 3 ways to make an effective choice

''Create your own style..Let it be unique for yourself and yet indefiable for others'' - Anna wintour

There's this stereotyped thinking that made in nigeria cannot match high standards or mean anything good, well, maybe they should try AsoEbiBella on instagram and see how exponential our fashion industry is growing.

Most young fashionists these days just love the clothing aspect and they don't really know what is in depth, fashion is business. why are you in it? for passion? love? well, we all want to make money and we really need to learn the business aspect of fashion, creating a new direction in our immediate society while staying creative. you are a star baby, don't let anybody tell you otherwise.

If you have God and a good work ethic, then you probably have all you need. lets talk about somethings that might enhance your choice of fabric.

As you are trying to perfect your sewing skills, you might feel the need to try the various kinds of fabric out there..satin, denim, ranging from cotton to wool and also synthetics sometimes,all these list of choices might seem overwhelming but hey! this career is meant for special people like you so no need to get all worked up. getting the know how fabrics varies will give you an added advantage when you want to choose one for your own work.

1.- For beginners, you might want to stick with cotton fabric, why? generally, cottons are very light, easy to work with and versatile; can be used in making clothes for almost any kind of occasion. Take ankara for example,.you see wonders people do with ankara these days right? the bags, shirts, gowns and so on.. but something is still missing, you know what that is? nigeria is yet to have a taste of your own uniqueness.

Do you know how many creatives style you can come up it if you are ready to really work? Say to yourself, i'm going to be the best fashion designer of my time. we can all be unique in our own ways. most designs made with cotton durable,easy to maintain. Let me share a secret with you (i know its not a secret you, you are a genius) Cottons tends to shrink sometimes,most likely after the first wash.

so what do you do? make sure you buy a little more than you actually need, then wash it before getting on your sewing machine,this is called pre shrinking, this will avoid shrinking after you've made the dress.

2.- Know your strengths and weaknesses - To be yourself in a country that is trying to make you something else is not a small thing. focus on your strengths at this stage in life, going for chiffons and satins at the early stage can be a step too much. i know you want to make AsoEbiBella, you will, its a gradual process. so try and stick to something you can experiment with and save money with at this time. you can get Ankara for 2k or more, even with this ankara, there should be no limit to your creativity. Even auntie bella will love it when she sees it.

3.- Design Counts- The design of your fabric should go hand in hand with whatever you are trying to make with it, be it bags,shirts,shorts. will the imprinted design suit the product? only buy fabrics you can see clearly and feel. most shops have are always dark and their white bulb does the trick, showing you something to how the fabric really looks like, color varies, you might want to bring it outside for clear visuals.

Hey queen, make sure you get to work fast, even this recession cant stop you if you don't want to be stopped. you don't have a machine? i'm sure you know about 3 people that has, why not do attache ?or you are just being lazy? There is no elevator to success, you have to take the stairs.

Don't forget to leave comments and share. the sky is your starting point. God bless you.

How To Be A Freelance Make Up Artist

''women are like tea we don't know we don't know our strengths until we are in hot water'' - Eleanor Roosevelt 

  i just get very annoyed people talk about nigerian girls as being dumped and not being business savvy.
   The most annoying part us when they tell you that the average american girls earns so and so $ per hour. well you should start telling them to bring those girls they compare you with down here and see if they can blossom in this kind of atmosphere.

As a make up artist, you are the backbone of your profession, if any change is going to happen, only you can make that dream become a reality, and you are powerful more than you can imagine.

A freelance make up artist is that person who performs make up on her own terms, that is you are not tied to any beauty salon, just like an eagle, you go out an soar on your own. people order for your services when they need you, as opposed to just sitting in the studio and hoping for customers to come.

This leads to a wide range of comfort and flexibility as you get to spend more time on building relationships with your potential clients. lets discuss these 2 points.

1. Be your own advertiser- whenever you want to leave the house, don't ever set foot outside your gate, i don't know where you are going and i don't care(lie,we are family) but the point is always wear your own work! showcase your productivity in a professional and inspiring manner.

you know how ants are attracted to sweet things right? soon enough, wherever you go, people will begin to build up communication with you and commend your work. make sure you tell them it's yours, that you made it by yourself and for yourself, next, hand them a business card(get a card soon,it's not that expensive) you can achieve anything you put your mind to, anything! say, it's possible.

2. Even the Holy Bible Said Ask and? - build up your confidence and tell them to refer you to their friends and loved ones. well, why would they not want to? i have faith in you, create something magical on their faces!

please do not offer discount in turn for customers to anyone if you are a pro, you are not shoprite, you are phenomenal. its generally an insult to the professionals, like you, don't settle for less. Thank you for your time, don't forget to drop your comment and share. God bless you.

Growing Your Fashion Brand

''There's this kind of strength that is almost frightening in black women.it is as if a steel rod runs right through the head down to the feet''- Maya Angelou

 As a young african entrepreneur, they've said you can't and you are going to show them that you can and you will.

You might already have some idea about who your target market is, but growing your fashion brand still needs a little bit of added sauce.
Lets look at it this way, lets say you make a very creative design for a customer you know quite well, a single female for example; you might want to try and expand but lets say you cant get across to all the females in nigeria for a start .

When you sit and analyze your market research you might just notice that your creative designs appeals to only some set of girls in a particular place, lets say lekki(i see you're smiling). these people here have a good income statistics(or so we think) and their environment already placed a unique sense of fashion on them/

What we should try and understand is that your design might be loved by more than just females in lagos and each of this group have their own opinion of why they want to wear your work. You know how styles and trends spread fast, summon your inner creativity and make something worth talking about.

You should not ignore marketing and public relations too, create a story behind your brand and sell that story to the media, our girls are quite social down here. you might just go from 0 to 100 real quick.

Always put in your very best to any cloth you make for whoever is going to showcase your designs, people just have eyes for beautiful things, add value to it and make it stand out(innovation). how can you achieve this? maybe you should just create a certain type of signature.. what fabric do you use the most? is it distinct? that alone can make you stand out.

The creative  effort you put into your work, trying to make it unique and different will go a very long way too..

Aspire to inspire before you expire, prove them wrong. if opportunity does not knock,build a door! don't forget to share and drop your comments.. God bless you